I just finished reading Searching For God knows What by Donald Miller (of Blue Like Jazz fame). Wow. That guy has some stuff to say, that's for sure.

Blue Like Jazz is somewhere on my list of all-time favourite books (well, the non-fiction category anyway). So when he came out with SFGKW I knew I'd have to grab it. It took me a bit longer to read. I bought it, read a couple chapters, and then let it sit for a few weeks. It wasn't that it wasn't good, it was just...different from his last book. It almost seemed like it was going to be a very basic book. It seemed to start off talking about things I felt like I already knew enough about -- namely, what it means to be a Christian. Talk about pride, hey?

I gotta say though, by the time I got half-way through, I realized this book was going to be just as life-changing for me as Blue Like Jazz. This book has a much more structured feel to it, a distinct purpose, and while he still writes a lot like he did in his previous book, it's not as 'essay'-like.

Anyway. My point for writing this was to say that it's an incredible book. When I finished it, I felt like someone had just turned on a defibrillator and gave my heart a jolt. I've been having a few of those the last while. As if after 22 years of thinking and looking at things one way, God's been sending doctor after doctor to shock me into reality, to see things from a new (and right) perspective.

There's something about how Miller writes and what he writes about, as well as his honesty, that makes me stop and reconsider all that I've thought. In this book, he talks mainly about what it means to be a Christian. It is really quite incredible. The funny thing is, he writes about a lot of things I've been sort of thinking through this last year -- and then I read this and realize it's almost like a summation/confirmation of all my thoughts. Crazy, crazy stuff.

Specifically, one of his central points is that Christianity is a relational experience. I mean, I've heard that my entire life -- "Christianity is a relationship, not a religion". But for whatever reason, it's never meant much to me. I never really understood what that was supposed to look like. I mean, I hear it but I don't see it. I don't see 'Christianity' in the same light I see my friends and family.

And yet Miller explains it in this book, about what the Gospel of Jesus really looks like, about what morality looks like, what its goal is, about what it means to be in a 'relationship'. And I seriously feel as if something like scales, as if years and years of unquestioned ideas, are falling from my eyes and my heart. I feel like I'm finally getting it, understanding what it is that God wants from me. And it's like this massive weight being lifted off my shoulders. All these religious practices, all these un-relational traditions I've bought into, have suddenly lost, or are in the process of losing, their significance to me.

One of the most eye-opening moments, and what drew me in, was the following:

Greg told me he had seen a pamphlet with four or five ideas on it, ideas such as man was a sinner, sin separated man from God, and Christ died to absolve the separation. He asked me if this was what I believed, and I told him, essentially, that it was. "Those would be the facts of the story," I said, "but that isn't the story."
"Those are the ideas, but it isn't the narrative, "Greg stated rhetorically.
"Yes," I told him.

Earlier that same year I had a conversation with my friend Omar, who is a student at a local college. For his humanities class, Omar was assigned to read the majority of the Bible. He asked to meet with me for coffee, and when he sat down he put a Bible on the table as well as a pamphlet containing the same five or six ideas Greg had mentioned. He opened the pamphlet, read the ideas, and asked if these concepts were important to the central message of Christianity. I told Omar they were critical; that, basically, this was the gospel of Jesus, the backbone of Christian faith. Omar then opened his Bible and asked, "If these ideas are so important, why aren't they in this book?"
"But the Scripture references are right here," I said curiously, showing Omar that the verses were printed next to each idea.
"I see that," he said. "But in the Bible they aren't concise like they are in this pamphlet. They are spread out all over the book."
"But this pamphlet is a summation of the ideas," I clarified.
"Right," Omar continued, "but it seems like, if these ideas are that critical, God would have taken the time to make bullet points out of them. Instead, He put some of them here and some of them there. And half the time, when Jesus is talking, He is speaking entirely in parables. It is hard to believe that whatever it is He is talking about can be summed up this simply."
Omar's point is well taken. And while the ideas presented in these pamphlets are certainly true, it struck me how simply we had begun to explain the ideas, not only how simply, but how nonrelationally, how propositionally.

[--snip--]

But I did begin to wonder if there were better ways of explaining it than these pamphlets. After all, the pamphlets have been around for only the last fifty years or so (along with our formulaic presentation of the gospel), and the church has shrunk, not grown, in Western countries in which these tools have been used. But the greater trouble with these reduced ideas is that modern evangelical culture is so accustomed to this summation that it is difficult for us to see the gospel as anything other than a list of true statements with which a person must agree.

It makes me wonder if, because of this reduced version of the claims of Christ, we believe the gospel is easy to understand, a simple mental exercise, not in the least bit mysterious. And if you think about it, a person has a more difficult time explaining romantic love, for instance, or beauty, or the Trinity, than the gospel of Jesus. John would open his gospel by presenting the idea that God is the Word and Jesus is the Word an the Word became flesh and dwelt among us. Not exactly bullet points for easy consumption. Perhaps our reduction of these ideas has caused us to miss something. (Searching for God knows What, pg. 151-153)

Alright. I quoted way more than I had planned -- don't tell anyone, or I might get thrown into jail.

He goes on to explain what it is that we may have missed. And I think he is absolutely right. At least, I missed it. And for the first time in a long time, or maybe ever, I feel like I know what I'm looking for -- like there is an actual something to want from God. And it's a relationship. A relationship and not a religion. An interaction, not a one-way conversation or list of do's and don'ts or a set of rituals or whatever. It's knowing Jesus and He knowing me.

He talks about Matthew 7:22-23, where Jesus says,

Many will say to me on that day, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?' Then I will tell them plainly, 'I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!'

What an incredible thought, that these people actually performed supernatural acts in God's name, and yet Jesus didn't know them. Crazy, crazy idea. I know that verse has always scared me, and I realize know it does so for good reason. I realize that there is a distinct difference between knowing about a person, and actually knowing a person. I also realize there is a distinct difference between a relationship and a religion.

I think I essentially just butchered his book, and I apologize for that. It is a very, very good read -- well worth the time and money (if you have no library access, that is).

Donald Miller officially has Kyle Stewart's Stamp of Approval. I know he wanted it...