There are a few things in life that make me furious, and infidelity in marriage is at the top of my list.

I was at work last night, and on my lunch break I was reading the newspaper and I came across one of those "Dear Abby" type columns, where someone writes in and the wise old (paid) sage gives advice. Well in this issue some lady writes in asking for advice because she has fallen madly in love with her husband's best friend. Apparently she has never felt this way before about anyone. And though they haven't yet had sex, they've kissed and cuddled plenty. Oh, and she and her husband have a new daughter. So. Advice-giver. What should she do?

I was at least glad that the 'Advice-Giver' laid into her pretty good (it's strange, but I usually find they're much less critical of women than of men). But after reading it I was so upset. I was furious. One guy who was sitting in front of me asked if I was alright. I think my face was pretty red. I don't think there is anything that makes me both physically sicker to my stomach and just pissed off as hearing about people cheating on their spouses.

I'm not sure where the anger comes from. I've never been married, and technically never really had anyone 'cheat' on me (though I've not been in much of a position to have that happen, though I've been through something I'd consider close enough as I'd ever want to be). But there is something so...fundamentally twisted about it that makes me even more cynical about marriage/relationships than I already am.

I've been doing good the last few months, in regards to how I feel about marriage and the like. I've gone from whatever to super critical and back to whatever. I felt like I was making progress these last few months about how I felt about 'love'. Like, for example, that it's possible to love someone and spend the rest of your life with them. I was becoming convinced. I was letting go of my cynicism. I was actually starting to look forward to it.

And then, in a matter of a few days, I stumble across story after story of infidelity and divorce and pain and hurt and anger and brokenness and disillusionment -- and all of my positive vibes about love and marriage were swept away by the tidal wave of reality. And I see these 'Christians' protesting gay-marriage in the name of 'protecting' marriage (and my feelings about that I will leave alone for now) and I think to myself, what in the world are they defending? What is there to defend?! How can a group of people who share the same percentage of divorces as everyone else have the audacity to stand up and say they're "defending" marriage? You actually believe that picket you hold means jack all?! Give me a break.

It just sets my blood on fire, all this crap about people falling in love with someone else, leaving their families and destroying lives. All because they've got hormones pumping through their veins and they don't have the brain power to control themselves.

Are there any people of loyalty out there anymore?! Does anyone know what it means to stick with a person because they promised, that no matter what, they would? Is anyone trustworthy anymore? Is anyone even up for such responsibility? All these marriages. So little guts.

It disgusts me.